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Is a good thing. You can always make time for it. To appreciate the things you possess: Health - physical and mental. Family - a solid foundation. Friends - to the day ones. Hope - I’m an optimist. -Van, August 17, 2025

So, what do you do when you've been ostracized? I can't say I've lived a life worth emulating, but I can honestly say, if I go now - I think I've done more good for the world than bad. Though, the line that separates the 2 is opaque. I'm sitting here at an enormous office, by myself, on a Saturday morning. With a cup of coffee and a glass of water by my side - the usual. You can say, "Must be nice," but the price of this freedom is crippling loneliness. I'm at a crux in the road, I can't move forward, the world is not ready. I can't go backward, that's suicide. The only move is sideways, what does that consist of? Not sure, but it's likely another road I'll take a lone. Not sure how it ends, but one thing is for certain - it will be spectacular. -Van, August 16, 2025

Having spent the last 2 years living out of my van: During the day, I'll find a quiet place indoors to get some work in where there is human commotion. At night, I try to find an empty parking lot to rest my head, then rinse and repeat the next day. I've been single for 5 years now, without any luck of a romantic relationship. I mean, I've had plenty of chances, maybe it's me, maybe I die alone? Hopefully not, but either way, at at least I can say I did it my way. -Van, August 15, 2025

I think Taylor took another dig at me, with my book title "The Key To Life: In 365 Quotes" in which I forgot to lower case the "to." And now it's embedded in the ISBN and cannot be changed. Truthfully, I did think about it, but in the case of uniformity, time and lack of integrity - I let it pass. Too many things could've gone wrong, and this didn't make the cut, it was a mistake. The mission was completed, but at what costs? Damaged taken: tribal-identity, integrity and class. In title case, you capitalize the first letter of each major word. Minor words (4 letters or less) are usually lower cased. -Van, August 13, 2025

i'm a 40 year-old man, homeless and unemployed. i've been trying to make it as an artist (comedian, book) for the last 5 years. i'm feel stuck - how to do i promote my brand and push forward with a story like mine? possibly the darkest of human nature (from prostitution, to rape to murder) and that's only the half of it. how do i approach a little kid or a family and convince them to purchase my book? do you separate the art from the artist? because that is the only way i'll be successful in this world. This quote is attributed to Oscar Wilde: "The artist is the creator of beautiful things. To reveal art and conceal the artist is art's aim. That is to say, real art takes no part in molding the social or moral identities of society, nor should it. Art had no moral responsibility. Art, should strive only to be a beautiful object entirely separate from its creator." so, what are my options? quit pursuing my dreams and get a 9-5? let's keep going til the wheels fall off. the plan is to stay in california till october, then seattle for a month, then vancouver in november. i'm a believer that things will work out - they always do - i'm an optimist, it can't be any other way. -van, august 12, 2025

things that are on my mind: m. its been 5 years since our divorce and she still haunts me. i heard someone say it takes 6 years to truly get over someone, we'll see about that. up until january, she was a backdrop, a distant memory, a fuzzy photo you only see from time to time. and now... she's engaging in diddy-like behavior? what a crazy ass stupid bitch. and the worse part is she's denying everything, and no one, i repeat, no one wants to talk about it. i feel stuck, my options are: take revenge, forgive, ignore. i'm leaning to the right. -van, august 11, 2024